I just finished my sessional exam today. Today's Surgery paper was just too shitty. Many of the question are so insignificant (as in it never came out in recent past years) till i don't even know what is it. Anyway, the battle is over as of now, but the war is still on. The final battle is in exactly one month time! In this one month, i must prepare myself mentally and physically and emotionally and spiritually equipped to face the battle. One month is not much at all, considering the number of books i have to "revise" and "remember". I must pass this final year exam!! i want to get rid of study life, once and for all (at least till my specialist course maybe). I dun wanna stay in this stupid India for another 6 months. One month of hardwork and no life! Just one month!!
This one month of study break will be further helped by the departure of my dear laptop. The Dell XPS M1530 has served me very well for the past 2 year (i still remember it reached me right on Christmas eve of 2007, it's the gift i bought for myself). Now, i'm getting tired of it not being able to play HD movies smoothly on my 22" LCD monitor. I think the extra resolution is too much for my nVidia 8600m GT graphic card. Also, those games that i bought can no longer be supported in full details and resolution (except 2004's Half-Life 2). Plus, i like to install all my favorite games in my hard disk, and 200GB for me is just way too little. Imagine my 1TB external HDD has 0% free space left. I need more power, more speed, more graphic rendering, more space (and obviously, more money).
Signed, Sealed, Delivered, I'm Yours So ya, i decided to list my laptop on eBay. Today, after 1 week of listing, it is sold for a whooping price of Rs 29500 (incl. shipment), which is roughly RM2100. It was a great deal, as it is exactly half of the original price of RM4500 2 years ago. I think it's a good way of getting the maximum out of laptop with the same value. See, i bought my first laptop Acer with RM4000, sold it after 2.5 yrs for half price, and i got this Dell with RM4500; now i sell it again for half price. I used the same RM4500 and get 2 laptops, at the same time have a powerful machine to keep up with my workload and gaming. Instead of buying a laptop, and wait for it to get spoil after 4 years, at the same time suffering from all the frustration of using slow and outdated machine. So tonight, i will be busy backing up my files, tomorrow reformat, pack it nicely and ship it with courier.
So, for the next 2 months, i wont be having a computer with me. I can study full time without any distractions. Besides, i can use the extra time i normally on exercising in my room and also play guitar, which is to me more healthy and less time consuming. I wont be able to keep up with latest football results, tech news, games releases, play facebook, chat thru webcam, or send emails (and obviously, wont be updating my blog for at least 2 long months). My iPod will play a BIG part in my life now, cz i can't live without music.
Homeward Bound I will be going back home on 8th Feb 2010, till 12th Mac. I'd already bought my ticket online. I have all the plans i gonna do in this coming long holiday. 1) Build a new Small Form Factor gaming PC, costing nearly RM5k. 2) Exercise, or maybe go to gym to lose my tummy and build up muscle. 3) Have surgery on my hyperhidrosis problem (endoscopic thoracic sympathectomy), it'll cost around RM5k. I'd ask the doctors in HUKM, and he say i can do it at the OPD as day case. 4) Celebrate chinese new year 2010! Yo, the year of Tiger!! 5) Spend time with family and friends. 6) Eat, eat & eat. 6) Play all the PC games collection i bought: they're all greatest games of all time, all well worth buying and collecting and playing numerous times.
Hello Goodbye That's all folks. This is it. Say goodbye to my Dell XPS laptop. Say hello to my future super strong gaming SFF PC. Say goodbye to surfing, chatting & gaming for 2 months. Say hello to textbooks. Say goodbye to final year MBBS. Say hello to internship. Say goodbye to India. Say hello to Malaysia.
Whenever i'm in my posting, the word 'bitch' and 'pussies' will keep lingering in my mind.. This is going to be my one last posting as a MBBS student, and it's Obstetrics & Gynaecology, and it is one load of a hell.. Everyday something stupid happens, some of us will get screwed by the "b****y" lady prof.. Things had gone from bad to worse again this morning, which i wont elaborate here.. I really hate OBG postings, and it had also made me lose some interest when i open my OBG books to study.. i really cant stand that almost all (except a few) OBG profs are so unpredictable and PMS all the time.. Our end posting exam will be on the 30th Nov, which is the latest among all the units.. Some units have even completed their end posting today and can concentrate fully on their preparation for sessional exam, but we're still stuck in this stupid posting. Every morning is filled with fear of getting late or get screwed out of nothing or losing attendance. Life sucks under OBG posting.. Even though i know this will be our one last moments of posting as a student, and we're supposed to treasure all the experiences that we have there, but still, every moment of the posting is like living with an unexpected timed bomb, it can explode any time..
My final sessional exam is exactly one week to go.. I realize there are so much more to study.. The text books are like never ending.. There are just too much things new to me.. Everyday, i'd spent most of my time studying like a bitch. I think this is the period my knowledge in medicine improved the most among all my 4 and a half years of the course.. One dilemma i'm having is that many times when i flip through the pages, even though i know the topic is not in the question bank, i will still read it thoroughly just for better understanding of the subjects and for future use. I know it's time wasting in the exam point of view, but i think that particular 'extra topics' are more important in my daily life, they're not those big diseases but they're cases of which i will encounter more... Actually if I'm going to be really exam oriented and analyze the past years well enough, I only need to cover half of the book to pass. However, by the time i become an intern, i will not understand or remember a single thing.. The most important part of medicine is understanding the basics, as many of my profs stressed on.. If you do not, then there's no way you'll succeed as a good doctor.. So now the irony comes.. I have only 1 month plus before my university exam, should i spend more time understanding the subjects, or be strictly exam oriented and memorize only the FAQs.. How i wish i have more time studying properly, and pass out being a doctor who know the subject well.. But then again, if i was given more time, will i be studying seriously, or will i be too relax and start fooling around? (which i think most likely i'll be the latter.) One more thing is, i really hate this place. Many things over here pisses me off.. If i fail this uni exam, i'll have to stay for another 6 months. Yes, i'll be much better in my knowledge within the 6 extra months, plus i do not mind staying longer provided i have the money to spend and all the entertainment and friends that i have here; but on the other hand, I also want to pass out my exam in one go and leave this stupid place asap.. So ironic..
Also, my classes officially ended today, but i din go cz i'm too sleepy due to the mental pressure in posting. Now, i do not need to wear formal shirts, go to class via the crappy school bus, walk under the hot sun, and listen to boring lectures and seminars, or get scolded or thrown out due to misbehavior, just for the sake of attendance. To me, lectures are over-rated. To me, taking attendance is stupid and time wasting. To me, sleeping in class or reading other books is a student's right. To me, yawning is only a reflex to take in more oxygen. To me, chewing gum in class helps students to be awake. To me, morning classes are meant to be bunked. To me, wearing T-shirts and short pants in classroom is totally alright. Who have attention span of 1 hour sitting quietly in the classroom? (except those really nerdy students). My attention span is only 30 mins max, after that i get restless. I think most of my time in lecture hall are spent on sleeping, or day dreaming, or studying by myself. I'll only pay attention if the lecturer is really good or the topic is interesting and important. Yes, now i no longer need to suffocate myself inside classrooms (hopefully in my whole life) anymore, woohoo! "We don't need no education," "We don't need no thought control," "No dark sarcasm in the class room," "Teachers leave us kids alone!"
Tomorrow is my Medicine end posting exam... It'll be my last contact with Medicine before my final exam.. By this time, i'm supposed to be perfect in all aspects: CNS, CVS, Respi, Abdomen theories; elicit the signs; speak in Kanada, make summary of case; give differential diagnosis; know the treatment etc etc..
But still i feel i still dunno anything and cant even talk to patient.. Am i fit to be a doctor like this??
I often think why am i not in Malaysia where i can speak in my own languages and get more interest into medicine, instead of being stuck in India, facing aliens with their foreign language and also finding myself always super unwilling to be in the hospital cz of the stupid Wenlock shit plus urine plus detergent smell... aihhhh......
Dr. RV Bhat, MV Prabhu, Venugopal and 1 more prof will be coming for my group... they're mostly super nice person.. hopefully things turn out fine...
For the past 4 days, it's been raining non stop.. Monsoon is supposed to be over by now, but the second phase suddenly came out of no where... The reason??? Mother Earth is dying!!!! Weather here is either extreme hot & sticky OR extreme wet & sticky.. they both sux.. Anyway, i still prefer rain to sun... i miss the weather in Europe when it's sunny hot but cooling, ahhhhh...
Malaysia to India It had been exactly one week since i came back to India.. I came back 10 days later than all my friends, and had skipped a numbers of classes, but it was all worth bunking for the extra fun and food in Malaysia.. I had a very very enjoyable holiday. I met many many old friends this time and even celebrated Chinese New Year with my family which i had not been able to for the last 4 yrs. Of course it's sad to come back to again, but that's my calling, plus i have some extra reason to be back there as well, hehe.. On the very first moment i stepped foot on Mangalore, Indians had already pissed me off. What happended is that me and Hong Ling took a cab from airport to town. After dropping off her, i asked him to fetch me to my hostel which is only 1 km away, but this useless driver asked for double cz he said it's considered two different destinations. Of course i wont give. So i scolded him and only give him a small amount of money, not a rupee more, not a rupee less. This is Indian stupidity No. 1: Money-Mindedness
Mangalore pub attacks 2 days before i came back to Mangalore, there was a scary incident: 40 young men went into a pub near our college on Saturday afternoon and started beating up a few young Indian girls, slapping them, hitting them, kicking them like an animals, assaulting their boy friends, molesting them, all without any reason. The police arrested 23 of them. These brainless people are backed by the ruling political party of this state. 2 days later, all 23 of the violent maker was bailed out, without any charge. A more sickening thing is that a big bunch of crowd were outside the police station cheering for them, giving them celebrated ovation and flower rings. When interviewed, those fuckers still said they'll do it again if there's a chance and they do not regret their deeds. Even the Chief of the Police said he would have beaten up his daughters is she is found in a pub. The head of the attack group - SriRam Sena, said the girls deserved it. What the fuck!!! Which era are we in now? Is going to pub wrong? Is it any of your business? Where's the respect for women? Where is the law? What are all the money-sucking useless dumb ass police doing? Just fewmonths ago, many churches are being attacked in Mangalore and many other places, then the terrorist attack in Mumbai. Now this violence against women. India is horrible, especially for us students who study here. No wonder India is still such a poor country full of useless people. Indian stupidity No. 2: Lawlessness.
Medical Postings I am now in Final Year MBBS.. I passed all my 3rd year papers, really thank god.. Final year will be the most busy year, with 4 subjects - Medicine, Surgery, Obrstetrics & Gynaecology, and Paediatrics. All the books are super super thick. I'm now posted in Medicine in Wenlock Govt Hospital.. Before this, i was really hoping i would be posted in KMC College Hospital. I don't care if Wenlock has more cases, more, more patients, more exposure, more practical practices; i just hate to be in a stinky and dirty and disgusting environment through out my 1 and half month medicine posting. I have to change my shirts every single day, my lab coat twice per week because of all the urine smell stains plus all kind of pathogenic microorganism under the sky on my shirts.. Most of the days, i have to take cases in the hospital after my afternoon class and can only be back at night time. Imagine my day starts at 8am every morning and finish only at around 8pm.. It's shitty. Life sux. Besides, this semester is full of seminars, so occasionally, we have to prepare seminars to be presented in the lecture hall, means even more extra works at night.
Lectures The lecture hall is another big let down. It's newly a constructed and enormous lecture hall, situated at the roof-top, and equipped with 2 projectors. However, it is not air-conditioned!! Imagine in India's hottest season of the year; from 2pm till 4.30 pm; Monday to Saturday; 250 students vs 1 single professor, after lunch... Of course, i will feel agitated, restless and sleepy. How do they expect the lectures to be effective and conductive? No way!! Some times, i myself will go to class with my short pants when every single classmates are on their full long sleeve formals. I know it's wrong, so what?! I don't even care. I mean, this weather is considered "summer" don't Indians have some common sense and allow the students to wear short pants and thin t-shirts? This is Indian stupidity No.3: STEREOTYPICAL
Slumdog Friday night i went to watch a movie in theater with Caryn and Karthik - Slumdog Millionaire. Directed by Danny Boyle, it is a piece of gem crafted by the combination of Bollywood and Hollywood. It is a movie about a slumdog Indian, who is the lowest and most worthless class of Indian, made his way to win the game show "Who Wants To Be A Millionare?" How he did that? A. He cheated B. He's lucky C. He's a genius D. It is his destiny Every single questions of the game show was written in his life experience, from small to young adult. His experiences guide us through the most comprehensive, real, shocking truth about life in India. The extreme poverty; religious fights; policeman's scariness and uselessness; caste system; illiteracy; urbanization, love. Everything is portrayed excellently well and impressive. Of my high movie taste, i dare say this is definitely one of the best movie i'd ever watched. It is very much similar to another of my all-time favorite - "City of God". The only difference is that "City of God" is more bloody and sets in Brazil. "Slumdog Millionaire" language is mostly in English, with some Hindi in the beginning. It won Golden Globe Awards, and was nominated for 10 Oscars, including Best Picture. I highly recommend this movie to every single one, truly a must watch!!
Hectic Final Year Life My life have been really hectic and tiring in this first week in college. At night after dinner, i can only aboe to study a few pages, but i would prefer to just sit on my chair and stare at the laptop, listening to music and watching some movies. I don't even have the energy to study anymore. Food over here still sucks as ever after my tongue had been so accustomed to Malaysian cuisines. Weather here is scorching hot. My throat had been a bit of uncomfortable since i came. Besides, local Indians here are "stupid" and annoying. The political members here are all hopeless. Day by day, my temper gets shorter; my body got sicker; my shirts get dirtier; my intelligence gets lower my fashion sense gets worse; my humor gets lesser . I really can't wait to leave India. I can't wait to get rid of my final year of studying plus another year of internship here. Every minutes spent here feels like a year to me. The only good thing over here is my room; Caryn; and my fellow friends. I can't wait to fly away from here fast. God help me.
In exactly 1 week time, i'll be having my University exam of my 3rd year MBBS. There's a 2 weeks study break for us, and i think it's rightly enough to cover 3 subjects - Ophthalmology, ENT n Community Medicine. Compared to last year, the work load is much lighter, and hopefully, by God's grace, i'll be able to pass all subjects. 1 week, seven days is a bit scary when i think bout it, hopefully i'll manage.
So far, 1 week had passed, and i can't find myself studying too long on my chair. I still get distracted easily, my mind still oftenly wander away, and i still do all kinds of shit. I juz assumed when you get too much free time all by yourself, you tend to take the time for granted and waste it juz like that. Recently, what i did besides studying was downloaded some HD movies and watched some, did some eBaying, played a lil bit of Pro Evo Soccer with frens and practised guitar. I planned to do gym in my room but everyday ended up too lazy or too tired to. So far I have Matrix, Gladiator, Shawshank Redemption, Full Metal Jacket & Dark Knight in HD, and watching them in supreme clarity & details along with crisp Dolby surround sound juz amazes me and make me appreciate them even more. But 8gb for a movie is juz too much sometimes, so i limit them only to my all-time-super-favourite list.
Yesterday, whole India was shocked and anxious bout the Mumbai bombing incident. It was HUGE, merciless, scary, and exciting. Even playing game like Call of Duty doesn't seems as exciting and cruelsome. Imagine: "two super high class 5 star hotels, some hospitals, police station, and railway station... AK-47, hand grenades... super well coordinated, random sweeping of bullets, floor full of blood... UK & US citizens being targetted, police officers died, people running around, numerous hostages......" Wow, the scenery is just "phenominal", "rare".
Today when i went to the toilet in the evening, i saw a 'peeping Tom' sitting quietly outside the windows. It never go away for looong time. I feel shy even to pee or take bath. It was there juz for shelter from the rain, and at the same time peeping on me doing private stuffs. I bet it's a female!!
The poster I made out of Adobe Photoshop for Community Medicine department as a punishment for having lack of attendance in the subjects. You know, I don't go for morning classes, never, for like 2 years plus, haha.. There's a famous saying "Morning classes are for nerds". I don't mean to be offensive, but i just love to sleep. If i go for morning class at 8am, my whole day will be ruined out of tiredness and lack of concentration. Next time my clinics or whatsoever will be open at 10am.
I'm having my sessional exams now.. Feeling so screwed up.. Argh!!
p/s: Actually the purpose of this post is so that i can print it out at cyber cafe without bringing my pendrive, cz every single lousy computers out there contains virus.
Today i just came out from my 1st paper of my 1st sessional exam of 3rd year MBBS. First paper was Community Medicine, a subject which i, together with majority of my class mates, ignore since 1st year. This is a darn boring subject, with all kinds of so called "general knowledge" but actually it's very complicated with all kinds of statistics and definition and methodology. I sat the paper only studied 1/3 of the portions and studied only once, in 4 days time. People spend weeks to study but i use only 4 days, haha, and mind u the 4 days are not those intensive sit-till-your-ass-pain study kind, i still fool around and slack here and there. Today, it only took me 1 n half hour to sit in the exam hall and write, whereas the paper is supposed to be 3 hours long. My paper was super empty. (I'm the 3rd to come out, normally i'm the first, hehe)
Tomorrow is Ophthalmology, and followed by ENT, Medicine and lastly Surgery. Among all, the subject i studied the most is Ophthal (1 week). My mum scolded me through SMS say i lazy, that's why cant finish studying. But think bout it, it wasn't my fault. Let me explain: I had my Supplementary exam for Pharmacology just 2 weeks before this sessionals, and all these while i was stuck with Pharmac, and every subjects in 3rd year are untouched. So imagine in 2 weeks time to cover these 5 subjects while all other people had 4 long months to cover them, IMPOSSIBLE!! So i tried to allocated my time: 1 week Ophthal, 4 days Comm Med, 3 days ENT, Medicine untouched, Surgery dun even have a book yet, wahaha.. Call me crazy!! Everyone say the professors wont even mark Comm Med and ENT paper, so actually this exam is very insignificant. Besides, i am mentally tired after the Pharmac exam, and few days back when i know that i passed the Pharmac paper, i was relieved and happy, tried to celebrate but can't as this sessionals is coming next.
Come on, this semester is supposed to be a honeymoon sem, everyday max 2 hours class, so of course we're supposed to enjoy and relax and do whatever shit u want. Even the college is not taking this sessionals seriously, so what for crack my head and burn my midnight oil suffering for exam? No way!! So, don't blame me!! It was the lack of time; the insignificance of this exam; the post-exam tiredness; the celebrating mentality, plus the holiday mood which 'encouraged' me not to take this sessionals seriously ..
OK, let's face it.. "Peer pressure".. "Ophthamology" (supposed to be my favourite field).. "They mark this paper".. "I can enjoy even more in the 1 week holiday if i had worked hard for the exam".. Fine!! Whatever..I should start opening the book right now and study....
Yeah, today i just finished off my Pharmacology supplementary exam. I did really well this time and kicked it's ass, haha, hopefully can get a first class. (Duh, i failed it 5 months ago and i studied this one subject in extra 4 months, of course i'm expected to kick ass) Now, i can start concentrating on my coming sessionals exam which features Ophthalmology, E.N.T, and Community Medicine. I'd never really touched all these 3rd year subjects yet cz all these while if not playing so many computer games, it's playing guitar and reading my Pharmac. That's how i spent my first 4 months in 3rd year MBBS, swt. The sessionals kick off on 3rd June, which is damn near actually. Come on, study!! (Compare to 2nd year, we have only 3 subjects this year and the books are so much thinner) My ambition is to become a Ophthalmologist, and let's see how well i do in this subject this year, and may God lead my future.
English Premier League had just finished. Man United retained their well deserved title, but had to get it till the last match of the season in a really long long tussle with Chelsea. So where my Liverpool stands? Erm, 4th, zz.. In the beginning of the season we started damn well, met all expectations, people thought it's maybe our time to get our 1st title in 18 years, but in Dec, our 2 stupid American idiot owner fought against each other, and it had affected everything, both on and off the pitch. So we slumped to a 2 months winless record, diao. But in March, everything went well again, and we won almost all our games. However, Liverpool still has plenty of things to be proud off:
Fernando Torres, our record signing of 21 million pound broke all records by scoring 24 goals in his debut season (the highest scorer of a foreigner in his 1st season). At last, after Owen, we have one truly prolific and skillful and fast and strong striker, yes!! Love ya!!
Pepe Reina got the Golden Glove award again, for 3 seasons consecutively, for keeping the most clean sheets in whole season! So who is the best keeper in England? Cech? Van Der Sar? haha
Liverpool is the English club that scored the most goals in all competition this season - 119 goals! That way above Manchester United. In Champion's League itself, we have 40 goals!!Imagine!!
Ok whatever, we still need to improve a lot a lot, cant always rely on Gerrard and Torres. Next season will surely better, hopefully..
My neighbor Liew bought a new guitar multi effect pedal last week - Zoom GFX 5. It cost Rs11000, but it's really good. Before he bought that, i'd already targeted mine - Digitech RP250 which cost Rs9500, but he got his pedal first and i was left behind still considering. Then this week he bought a new guitar - Ibanez Prestige RG 2570 that cost Rs54000, which is super good looking and super nice to play and as it's name implies, super prestigious. Me? Still stuck on my Fender Squier Strat. So, feeling outdated and get sick of my Strat's 'dull and soft' sound, i decided to modify it myself. I researched so much online, and at last managed to do some fine tuning, and now my guitar sounds much nicer and warmer and louder, and easier to play. I know i cant change a crow into a phoenix, but it can becaome a parrot at least. Today, as i surf for great guitars, i stunbled upon Fender American Deluxe Stratocaster. I was like.. drool..wow..it's the best guitar manufactured by Fender. It's so sexy, and according review, it's touch is so warming and playing it is so exciting and satisfying. It has 3 Samarium Cobalt Pickups, 22 Jumbo frets, Synchronized Tremolo, Sealed Locking Tuning Machines , S-1 pickup switch and highly detailed engineering. Now, it's in my wanted list already, and it's so going to be my next baby. But wait, let's face it, where do all the money come from? The guitar will cost $1700, which is at least Rs80000. Before this I'd already decided to save more money this term but still i managed to spend so much recently. Finger cross i must not buy all these so fast, at least wait for another 6 months because i think i don't deserve them now, i really don't deserve to have this baby yet. My skills is still noob and i should be happy to settle with my Fender Squier and Digitech RP80 which a friend don't want and gave me. Now, i have a guitar which is not so bad, and a multi effect pedal which has many many effects to be played. Enough Chee Chung!! Be satisfied already!!
